100 word challenge week #11
There was a very mysterious statue in the park. Everyone was scared of the statue. It always
stays there ,it never moves. So you might think. every night the statue wakes
up and walks to the center of the park. There are other statues there too. All
of them say hi then they start to party until dawn. After, they go back. That
night when the statues where having a
party some people came to the park. They saw them partying so, then the people
told everyone. Then everyone started to like the statue.
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ReplyDeleteHello Sushilover,
ReplyDeleteYou have only used one adjective to help paint a picture in your reader's mind. Include descriptive words before nouns e.g. 'wooded park', 'dance party', and 'terrified people'. Do not repeat words; you used 'statue(s)' six times!
Your writing will not improve unless you learn the lessons taught in class.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Van